No One Is Indispensable
It was my service year; I was approached by the outgoing Papi to take over a post which entails me living at the family house. I loved my space, there at the general lodge, you know? Do whatever you want to do, cook and eat whatever you want to eat and so on. I wasn’t living a sinful life, no, I wasn’t. The family rules was in tune with my believe, dress modestly at all times etc except the contribution for feeding. I had my plan and a mental calculation on how to cut my cost in preparation for life after service, So I said no. Moreover, life in the general lodge was more convenient than in the family house. He asked me to think about it and give him a positive answer later in the week.
On my way to my place of primary assignment that morning, I made up my mind to reject the offer, I was barely a year in my new found faith, I believe I wasn’t sanctified and still a baby in the Lord’s Vineyard, they need an adult and not a baby. That night I had a revelation in my dream which made me believe I was sanctified and God wants me to take up the post.
The outgoing Papi and Mamo (use to refer to the President and sister’s welfare co-ordinator respectively) met me on different occasion but I didn’t just want to accept it.
“Hello Sis” He said.
“How about what we discussed the other day?”
“I will take up any post that does not warrant me staying at the family house.”
He smiled and still asked me to pray about it.
I asked God for another sign, he gave me yet another. In a trance he held my left hand and led me through a lonely road and eventually we came to a hospital. He didn’t say a word but I know what it means. He has led and guide me all through this years and saw me through a major surgery (story for another day) the previous year. Why can’t I trust him in this one? I cried and woke up with tears in my eyes, I could not keep the tears away. I was an ungrateful child.
I pray and asked him for forgiveness and I started strategizing on ways to contribute positively in the Lord’s work when I finally assume the post. I made up my mind that night to pack all my stuffs from the general lodge to the family house, I thank the Lord for giving me a chance to work in his vineyard.
The next morning, my flimsy reasons and excuse took over the strong urge of packing my things to the family house and doing the will of God. I never took up that post.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Each time I remember that incidence, I will be filled with guilt. Though I was given another post that doesn’t warrant me staying in the family lodge but then there is nothing like the perfect will of God.
Was the post vacant because I refuse to accept it? Sure, no! God choose someone else. Till date I still feel bad when I remember I failed Him in that aspect.
When God ask you to do something, please my dear, do not hesitate. It might not be favourable to you but please just do it.
Have you forgotten? HE replaced Saul with david (1Samuel 16:1), HE replaced Vashti with Esther (Esther 2:4, 17 2:4, 17), He replaced Judas with Mathias (Acts 1:26). He can also replace you, you are NOT indispensable!